Chaplin’s been waking me up at 4:30 the last few mornings to stare me in the face then bite me on the nose once I wake up, so I thought perhaps I should get him something new to amuse himself with.

I went to the pet store and found this awesome giant mouse/scratching post that’s stuffed to the gills with catnip, and here’s what Chaplin thinks of it:

After the jump, more pictures to prove I am turning into a crazy cat lady, courtesy of the CrapCam.

I bitch about $3.25 a gallon gas, but in Britain, it’s a bit worse:

Graham, 48, a London building contractor, pointed at the price on the pump — the equivalent of $6.62 a gallon, which means it costs him $125 to fill his tank.

Ouch.

A few tips from Tiki Night with co-workers last night at the Tiki Ti:

1. Tiki Night should not take place on a night where you have to work the next day. You will be sorry.

2. Make sure you eat something nice and greasy before Tiki Night commences. I did not obey this rule, and I am currently paying the price.

3. Do not, particularly after having a Space Pilot and a Vicious Virgin, decide that you should order an Uga Booga to hear your co-workers and the rest of the bar chanting its name.

4. Definitely do not drink the Uga Booga. There’s enough Myers Dark Rum in there to stun an elephant.

5. Note what normally serene co-workers are shouting at a large group of screeching girls to “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” It makes for entertaining office banter in the morning.

Is it too late in history to take idiots like these people and behead them and put their heads on pikes as a warning to others who would follow the same path?

Priya…received a Mercedes convertible and an assortment of diamond jewelry for her birthday. Her sister’s graduation gift package included a Bentley, diamonds and two homes in India.

“I was really surprised,” Divya said, “because I was only expecting a Bentley and one house.”

and (and!):

Sophie was just as quick to defend her mother’s decision to spend $180,000 for her party. “Unless they were crazy or hated their child, any parent who was financially able would do it,” she said.

Dude, your party cost more than my entire (not inexpensive) college education! Please, for the love of God, buy yourself some perspective!

I’ve heard a theory that shows like My Super-Sweet 16 are going to incite the proletariat into bloody revolution.

People like these schmucks make me think that might not necessarily be a bad idea.

Looking back at the many changes in my life over the last few years, one’s been sticking out like a sore thumb to me recently.

Since when have I become obsessed with being organized?

My apartment is spotless. This has never happened in a place where I live…ever.

My desk at work is clean every night, even though since we finished shooting and the ADs no longer need to use it at night, it’s not necessary.

We’re moving a lot of stuff around at work, and nothing makes me happier than making a room as efficient and organized with everything as easily accessible as possible.

I partially blame Lifehacker, a tremendously useful little site that’s got thousands of tips on how to get your ass organized but quick. It’s great, but I’ve gotten addicted to trying out all their little productivity ideas.

I’m not to the point where I’m reading other “organizational porn” like 43 Folders or, God forbid, the Getting Things Done system they relentlessly flog. But the mere fact that I know what these things are is somewhat disturbing.

What the hell is wrong with me?!

You have to not only eat some of it for dinner (thus defeating the eat-it-whenever point of purchasing frozen food), but you have to move vodka out of your freezer in order to make room for all of it.

Or perhaps that’s a sign you have too much booze in your house, that the vodka is taking up that much room in the freezer.

Maybe you should drink more.

If you think you’re interested in seeing this movie, stay home and watch an episode of 24 instead.

It’s the same general concept: Someone wants to kill the President. Kiefer must stop them before they do.

Ostensibly, Michael Douglas also must do so, but he spends about two thirds of the movie running around like a chicken with its head cut off, and thus, it falls to Kiefer to actually do the stopping.

And though it’s a two-hour movie instead of an hour-long episode, Douglas’s actions make no sense for about an hour of the movie, so you’re back to an hour of watchable film.

Granted, nothing on 24 has made much sense recently, but at least they keep things moving at a brisk enough pace to keep you from pointing out how ridiculous it is until after the episode is over, whereas I was mentally deconstructing this movie by the end of the first act.

But really, this is just an extended episode of 24 where Kiefer wears a really weirdly cut suit for the whole day. Save your ten bucks and just watch 24.

I hate that I like Cute Overload, especially since their super-precious writing style drives me totally nuts. But how can you resist pictures like this:

It’s so fucking cute, I feel the need to go hug my cat after looking at it. There’s something terribly wrong about that.

Ugh, I feel dirty. I think I have to link to this scary-ass post from Go Fug Yourself to try and counterbalance this disgusting display of cuteness.

Set your TiVos, kids 10.5: Apocalypse is coming May 21 and 23rd to NBC.

The plot, believe it or not, is even more ludicrous:

In a desperate bid to save lives – and the country – President Hollister (Beau Bridges) calls once again upon one of the nation’s top seismologists, controversial scientist Dr. Samantha Hill (Kim Delaney) and her supervisor and former boyfriend Dr. Jordan Fisher (David Cubitt), to interpret the latest onslaught of quakes. At a loss for how to interpret this continued seismic and now volcanic disruption, Hill re-discovers her seismologist father’s (Frank Langella, as Dr. Earl Hill) much-discredited hypothesis from years past that if correct, predicts even greater ruin and a complete altering of the North American Continent – a Continental Divide of the land mass.

This is going to be spectacularly awful. I’d better start stocking up on popcorn and vodka…

While watching the Daily Show, I saw an ad for Easy Mac Cups.

The theory is that there seems to be something standing between Americans and their Easy Mac: The need for a bowl. Solution? Have the company provide the bowl with the packaging.

Are we so fucking lazy as a country that we have to make “takes two minutes to cook!” Easy Mac even easier?

At that point, why doesn’t Kraft just add water to it? Then all the consumer would have to do is put it in the microwave! God, marketing in this country is ridiculous.

I also found it ironic that the ad ran during a Daily Show where Jon Stewart interviewed the author of a book on competitive eating, and they spent a lot of the time talking about how the rising popularity of competitive eating is becoming a symbol for our country’s moral bankrupcy.

So what do we advertise? A product that makes it even easier for Americans to collectively sit back and gorge ourselves silly with dehydrated processed cheese food. Awesome.