I have a busy enough weekend planned. I’m going to the tax accountant. I’m having an Oscar party. I’m going to attempt to wall-mount my TV (though if that fails spectacularly enough, I will not be having an Oscar party).

So, with all that on my plate, you’d think I wouldn’t be stupid enough to decide that this is the weekend to buy an expensive new router, attach my hard drive to it, and try and get the ports forwarded in a way that doesn’t expose all my data to the interwebs.

Apparently, you’d be wrong. I am exactly that stupid.

The Emmy Quote of the Evening comes from Mariska Hargitay, who seems just as mystified at I am over her win in the backstage press gaggle:

It’s crazy! Who wins an Emmy on a cop procedural - I do! I guess I say “Where were you Tuesday night?” really well!

And now, I’m off to cry over the series finale of motherfuckin’ Deadwood. I hate you, HBO.