Happy 4th of July!

While you are barbecuing various items and drinking yourself silly, the Consumer Product Safety Commission (and whoever cut the CPSC's video to the soundtrack) would like to remind you to use care with your fireworks this year:



Hat tip: Consumerist.

The Onion Strikes Again

Being friends with mostly theater geeks in High School, I rather enjoyed this (particularly the last line about the location of the Technical awards):


High School Tony Awards Honor Nation's Biggest Drama Club Nerds

And Now, Your Moment of Zen

Courtesy, as it often is, of the Brits and a formerly pay TV channel going free and rounding up Celebrities to make them do absurd things:



The video is titled "Ewan McGregor as a Tomato," but I was far more surprised and amused at the costume with which they managed to saddle Dame Judi Dench.

Thanks to Tomato Nation.

Edited to add: And, Ewan-as-tomato gets kicked in the crotch:

Yikes

This probably wasn't the most dignified way for the Caps to wind up tying their playoff game last night:



Note the guy that falls over: He took a direct hit to the family jewels with the puck, and now the poor bastard might wind up minus one of them.

Yow. Even being a Caps fan, I'm not sure that play shouldn't have been blown dead before Mike Green scored. I think it happened too fast for the refs to realize what had happened, but still, sucks for the Flyers.

Thanks(?) to Deadspin for the tip.

Only One W Needed

Via Defamer, the perfect one-word [over and over again] summation of being a Lost fan:



I love people with the kind of free time that allows them to put something like this together.

Happy Purim!

I have no Hamentashen on hand, so instead, enjoy "Jewno":



I already knew J.K. Simmons (the dad) was awesome, but the fact that he actually appeared in this raises my opinion of him even higher.

Courtesy Defamer.

Why I Wish I Was A Cartoon Voice-Over Artist

Because then I'd get to participate in unbelievably awesome stuff like this, from the voices behind Spongebob Squarepants:



via Dave Barry's blog and BoingBoing.

For A Guy With No Legs, He Kicks A Lot Of Ass

An aside huzzah: I now have a replacement replacement computer. Let's see if this one works for more than a day.

I was catching up with Fark links for the last day when I came across a fascinating story about a man with no legs who surreptitiously took pictures of everyone who stared at him as he wheeled around the world on his skateboard.

Kevin Connoly's site is a little flash-heavy, but it has some of the best pictures from his exhibition. It's definitely worth a look, and you can see what he means about getting the same look all over the world.

His site also leads to a story with a really interesting video about the project and his life in general.

I don't have much more to add beyond that at the moment, but I was so captivated by this guy's story and project that I felt I ought to share.

A Distressingly Close Approximation Of My Office At The Moment

Is shown in this video from the kids at Late Night With Conan O'Brien.

You can't hear the buzz of the overhead fluorescent lights as loudly as you can in my office right now, but the level of deadness is pretty comparable.

Sarcastic British Geeks = Hilarity

My cousin Mark, who enjoys the Halo series very much, sent me the following video, which he said captured his feelings about Halo 3 very well.

I'm not a gamer much beyond Tetris and desperately trying to find a Wii (and then finding it at the one point I couldn't afford it) for the last few months, but I thought this review by a Brit for an Aussie magazine was hysterical:



Now every time someone says the words "Easy Street" I'm going to picture a little sign below it that says "We've got hookers!"

On a separate but related note, I was listening to one of my BBC podcasts and I heard a member of Parliament (a Conservative who was chairing some committee related to finance) describe the missing data fiasco I wrote about the other day as "a major cock-up."

It still sounded more dignified than anything anyone in Congress has said in some time.

On A Lighter, More Baseball-Related Note...

Two bits of post-World Series amusement, firstly from The Onion's Sports department:

Colorado Rockies: 'What The Fuck Just Happened?'

and, courtesy of Mark, one of my favorite interweb videos in some time, answering the above question:

He Ate WHAT?!

I listen to the BBC Global News Podcast in the car while I'm schlepping various things around Los Angeles, because it's an easy way for me to maintain my goal of being reasonably informed about the rest of the world.

It's normally fairly straightforward and British and reserved, but with one rather odd story to finish up the podcast.

This video was the subject of this morning's kicker:



I have to admit, when the BBC announcer, in his velvety, dignified British tones, said "An Australian politician is caught eating his own earwax" at the top of the podcast, I burst out laughing.

A Call For Koreans

Because I would love a translation and/or explanation for the following video of Korean baseball teams fighting:

glumbert - Hold your feet! Korean baseball gets strange

Although I have to admit, I think I would enjoy it very much if the next time Barry Bonds gets hit by a pitch, he just started hopping out to the mound on one foot, ready to bowl someone over in a chicken-fight.

Courtesy Dave Barry's Blog, who suggests that perhaps it's time for a different sort of drug investigation in Korean baseball.

Odd Jobs

I am not the only member of my family with a job that is a bit unusual.

My stepbrother Rob does PR for Chik-Fil-A, which is how he ended up doing the weather in a cow costume on the local Fox morning show in Atlanta.

That Is The Question

Will It Blend? is a hysterically awesome series of two-minute-ish videos produced by a company that makes industrial-strength blenders for the home.

They take all sorts of shit (everything from a fruit smoothie to a rake to a bunch of old cellphones), toss it in one of their blenders, then ask the simple question, "Will it blend?"

Generally, the answer is yes, though you often don't want to breathe in the smoke created during the blending process, as it carries a slight risk of...well, fatality.

So of course, I knew they would inevitably blend and iPhone. The only question was when. The answer? Today:



They also have a great recent one of some Transformers, where the guy talks about his 25(!) grandkids and how much they enjoy watching grandpa pulverize stuff with his blender.

And How Was Your Cinco de Mayo?

Did it go a little something like this?

I have to say, they got the perfect announcer voice for that. The list of side effects is also great.

Courtesy Dave Barry's Blog.

Showoff

Via Defamer, Michel Gondry demonstrates that even semi-insane yet excellent directors can end up with too much time on their hands...or feet:

Seriously, I can't even solve those goddamn things with both hands, concentrating really hard.

Kids: Wise Beyond Their Years

While pursuing Deadspin today, I ran across this video of some of my fellow 'Skins fans expressing their frustration with the team this year:

Sadly for these kids, when I was their age, the 'Skins won two Super Bowls over the course of four years. I think they're going to have to wait a while for that.

Sometimes, I Miss My Old Job

Not because I miss the sheer insanity it involved, but because I would really love to know what they had to cut out of this clip.

Hat tip to Defamer.